Knowing your values can help you find your fit

Have you ever felt like you did not fit, but you could not put your finger on why? Maybe it’s been in a job, a relationship or a circle of friends. We often throw around this notion of “fit” without understanding what creates that sense of connection.

Your values – the beliefs most important to you – guide and motivate your actions and attitudes. It is more than knowing what you like to do or what you are good at. Values reveal your why and how you want to do and be in the world. They are your inner compass.

These core beliefs articulate what you stand for and how you show up in your life. Knowing your top values sheds light on what type of work you want to do, how you relate to others and what you believe in. It sounds simple, but we often do not recognize our values or when they are being ignored.

Finding the right “fit” is easier when we know what is most important to us and how we want to show up.

Try identifying your top three values. Describe your why and how in three words. It is not an easy task, considering many lists include close to 150 possibilities. But the process of narrowing the list to three will give insight to what is most meaningful in your life. Then you can evaluate how closely your current life matches with your values and what needs to shift.

Step One: Answer these questions

  • When you were the happiest? What were you doing? What factors contributed to your feelings of happiness?
  • When you were most proud? What were you doing and what made you proud?
  • When have you felt most fulfilled and satisfied? What were you doing and what need was fulfilled or satisfied? How did this add meaning to your life?
  • When have you felt most frustrated? Or regretful? What was missing? These experiences illuminate what is important that may have been ignored or pushed aside. 

Based on your answers, what values come to mind that are important to you?

Step Two: Name your top values

Follow the steps below using this list of values:

  • Highlight all the values on the list that have meaning for you. What emotions are attached to each one?
  • For each highlighted value, ask does this define me and is it something I embody?  Is this a value upon which I make decisions? (Think about important life decisions you’ve made and what value underpinned your choice.)
  • Divide your highlighted list into categories or topics. For example, you may have achievement, excellence, and perfection in one category. Of the values in the category, which actually defines you and informs your decisions?
  • Pick one value from each category that is most important.
  • Finally, narrow the list to the three key values that embody who you are, how you live and how you make decisions.

Step Three: Is your life in alignment?

Based on what is most important to you, how well are you living in accordance with those priorities? Think about the various aspects of your life and see how it aligns with your top values.

How would you rank yourself in each area based on your top values? Give yourself a score of 1-10, with ten being in full alignment.

 Top Value 1Top Value 2Top Value 3
Career   
Family   
Finances   
Friends   
Fun   
Health   
Spiritual   

What would those roles look life if you did align those with your values?

What is one thing you can do now to live your top values?   

If you’d like help narrowing down your top values, schedule a free discovery session and we’ll find what matters most so you can be your best.

Leading through uncertainty requires future vision and present focus

What do you see in these two images?

I took these two pictures in the same spot, on two different days at roughly the same time in the morning. The first day the sun rose unobscured over the horizon lighting up the higher clouds and casting a beautiful glow on the water. That day my eyes stayed on the horizon as the clouds changed colors and the sun rose higher and the sky turned blue.

On the second day we realized the darkness was more than just the last hours of twilight, but that clouds and fog surrounded us. The horizon shrouded in gray, the sun’s rays could not penetrate the thick blanket and we could no longer see the far side of the lake or even the houses and streetlights tucked in the trees.    

Not having a sun to watch or pink clouds to marvel at, I found myself looking around at the stand of trees behind me and how the gray light against the flaxen grasses and golden cottonwood leaves cast a warm glow in the small meadow. The yellow and faded green of the prairie grass, the gray-brown tree bark and rusty orange shrubs shone brightly against the dim light.

The power of the clouds

I prefer to go out at sunrise with my photographer husband when the sun’s rays light up the whole sky turning clouds every shade of pink and orange, red and purple. Those are the days worthy of dragging myself out of my warm bed.

But I saw a whole different beauty on that foggy day – and it was the fog that forced me to see it. If the sun had come out, I would have only seen the glow from afar and not the color from those swaying cattail grasses right in front of me.

I started to see the clouds and the beauty they reveal – and ultimately their power to pull my gaze away from the horizon to what is right in front of my face.

Isn’t life just like the sunrise – some days shining brightly illuminating a horizon in the distance and other days gray and gloomy?

Seeing through the fog of life

The clouds reminded me of the uncertainty in life, when we cannot seem to see the future. When our view is blocked or the path unknown, it can feel as fogged in as that day on the lake. It can feel unsettling and frustrating.

But like that foggy day, uncertainty can draw our focus inward and immediately outward to our present. In fact, it can force us to be in the here and now because we acutely understand that tomorrow is unknown.

I thought of the many clouds in our world today, from the global pandemic, social unrest, economic volatility and the myriad individual challenges of job losses, illness, and death. How can we see the beauty in the fog of life?

Looking back on my own journey and the times I felt the sky closing in on me, I saw clearly how those challenges pushed me to see things differently, opened my eyes to new possibilities and forced me to decide what I would focus on. Would I choose to whine and complain that the sun was not shining, or could I see the beauty in its dim light?

Leading requires seeing a horizon and a shore

Fog can easily disorient us and make us wonder if the sun will ever shine again, or if the horizon still exists. The challenge for leaders is holding both images at the same time – being able to envision a future while also recognizing the beauty in the present moment.

What is your vision and mission for the future? Has the current reality changed that vision or just clouded your path to achieving it? Hold that purpose in mind even if you cannot see a clear road ahead.

Then look around at your team – really look at them. Who are the glowing grasses in your midst? How can you tap their strengths and build on their talents? What other gifts or opportunities have presented themselves in this turbulent time?

Those two very different sunrises reminded me to stop worrying about the future and focus on the present. It sounds so simple, but I do believe it is one of the hardest things for our human minds to do.

If you need help clarifying your vision, schedule a complimentary strategy session.

How to achieve a goal when you are unsure where to start

Sometimes we have to stop analyzing and just keep moving forward

I find nature to be an incredible teacher that provides perspective on life beyond the trail or outdoor experience. A long hike through an undulating tundra basin in the mountains reminded me that the only way to reach the summit is one step at a time. The same is true for achieving your goals, whether those are organizational or personal aspirations.

The path will reveal itself

The trail ended at a beautiful alpine lake. From this point, the route is undefined with no path to follow other than descriptions from previous hikers.

It sounded straightforward – follow the creek to the end of the basin and ascend the steep slopes to the peaks directly in front and to the right. The terrain looked easy enough with tundra spreading out into the high mountain bowl dotted by small rock outcroppings and boulders on either side.

What appeared to be a gentle slope was actually a series of earthen shelves like giant stair steps. The rocky ledges obscured our view and hid the high peaks that we used as landmarks.

I kept stopping to find the best line, the path of least resistance or the path that seemed closest to maintaining our direction into the basin. Should we go straight up this incline or veer to the right and avoid the steeper slope – not knowing if the shelf cliffed out or continued a moderate climb through tundra and rocks? The constant stopping equaled slow progress and building frustration.

Stop analyzing and trust your gut

I consulted my husband many times inquiring which way to go. After multiple stops and debates I realized that with each successive shelf climbed, the route up the next became clearer. I just needed to trust my intuition and keep moving forward.

Focusing on the ground and features in front of me I steadily put one foot in front of the other. Not always a straight line, but staying in the same directional path we knew to lead to the basin’s end. With each few steps I saw easy rocks and grassy ramps to ascend until we reached the highest point surrounded by high peaks. The rest was an easy scramble up the steep slope and onto our summit.

Just keep moving forward

Do you have an image of what you want your organization to be like or how you want to lead? Or perhaps you have personal goals you want to achieve but feel overwhelmed wondering where to start. There are so many different ways and choices to make, just like the route to the mountain. It’s easy to get bogged down in the how and which way and what is the PERFECT way, that we stop moving at all. We can be paralyzed by the unknown. This hike was a clear reminder that sometimes we have to trust that the path will reveal itself…but not until we take a few steps forward.

Don’t let analysis paralysis stop you in your tracks. Visualize achieving your goals. Choose one step that will move you closer to that vision and trust that the next step will be revealed. You will get nowhere if you sit and ponder the many ways you can get there and choose none of them. Pick the path that feels right and keep moving forward. Suddenly you’ll be at the end of the basin with the summit at your fingertips. Take the first steps – even baby steps.

If you need help identifying your next steps forward, schedule a complimentary strategy session.